Asking for Support

We can do hard things. We can ask people for help, support, even money.

Rev. Emilie Boggis

I often hear from folx: “I’ll volunteer in any way for the organization. I just won’t ask people for money.”

As a leader of a faith-based community, I have to ask people for practically everything all of the time. Time, leadership, resources, connections, and yes, money. We are a voluntary organization led by people’s outpouring of time and leadership and funded out of our people’s generosity.

That said, it’s scary to ask people for things. I’ve been trained to be self-sufficient. In fact, I’ve caught myself believing that “asking for help” is a sign of weakness, failure even.

Therefore, I’ve transformed “asking for support” into a spiritual practice. Not only for myself but for our community.

In the last year, my organization created a group of peer givers. They were folx who had generously given to our mission and who were now charged with asking others. Almost unbelievably, they said yes to this role.

We gave them foundational principles, script for conversation, training (including role plays!), and support all along the way. I moved from fundraiser to cheerleader.

Even I was surprised by the transformation in their demeanor. At first, they were so afraid. You could feel the nervous energy. Breathe, I reminded them. Settle your body. Connect with what you love about our community. Then, remember the conversation begins by listening to what they love about our community. Then, let your shared love guide you.

One peer giver said: “The whole experience gave me the courage to do hard things. Once I did it, I found such pleasure in the connections I made with other folx. It opened me up to joy.”

We can do hard things. We can ask people for help, support, even money.